My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
