He is such a slut. More and more my type.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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