? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
