there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Watching her eat just hurts me
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
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