he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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