i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
