He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
