absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
