i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
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