I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize