How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
