This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
