I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize