New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
