Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
