Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
