Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize