im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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