Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
