I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
