I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
