Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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