i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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