Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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