His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
