lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
