how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
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we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize