Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
