toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
The struggles of a small town man whore
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
