I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
