What a fucking waste of an outfit
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
