you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
