DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
