im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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