I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
