Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize