There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
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