I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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