What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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