I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
