he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
