fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
