Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Hello my rib-scented angel!
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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