You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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