Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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