chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
