What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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