3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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