ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
