if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize