...so i touched it.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
